Saddest day

Today we were shown a list of abnormalities, most of which Reuben displays, alongside photos of severly disfigured children. A week ago marked the end of the happiest time of my life, pregnancy, then his birth, the greatest, short lived moment and today, the saddest day of our lives. We're awaiting a bed at UCLA which has a specialist wing. Our IVF Dr, Dr Sam is sending a paediatrician friend to help us, a nurse has pretended we're a friend of hers in order to get us up on the wait list. Everyone is so helpful. Now we have to leave St John's as they're unable to treat him here in the NICU. And St John's is full of mums on wheelchairs taking their babies home or premie babies who get stronger by the day before they are taken home. He'll require many surgeries and months in hospital before we can ever bring him home, if at all. And as expected, our little Boo will have a shorter life expectancy.